The Impossible is Possible! Random Updates

People are always very worried about Bear Form's constant mouth open problem. Well, worry no more, and rest assured in the fact that it is possible for it to be closed. No kidding. Seriously. See the above screenshot.

Unfortunately, this seems to be only true when you are swimming as a bear. Go figure, you don't want to swallow the entire ocean.

Also, my latency continues to be evil. No lie. Check it out!



But! I just downloaded PerformanceFu, so hopefully my issues will be alleviated a bit.

I have recently also got an influx of fun mail in my mailbox. I've received thank yous from people, interesting offers from Ratshag (he doesn't like begging, but apparantly his tentacle-faced self needs to be pimped), and also a gray pick-axe with a note saying "for my nose." My friends are weird.

I finally got to see Archimonde go down. So awesome, that last ten percent where you're immune to everything, and you can just dps the heck out of him. Also, jokes about Finger of Death, and "being Fingered for over 100k damage" will never, ever get old. Ever.

♥ to you all, I'll have something more substantial up for you a bit later!

Get a Little Woody

[13:16] Bellwether: I was thinking about Lifebloom.
[13:16] Bellwether: This is really bad.
[13:17] Nightravyn: ohhhhhh?
[13:17] Bellwether: Lifebloom is like sex. You have to keep a steady rhythm and keep it going, because if you bloom too early, everyone is disappointed in your performance. And it gets harder to work up the momentum again.
[13:17] Nightravyn: ::giggling::
[13:18] Siha: And the bloom is fundamentally the same whether you've been going for a moment or forever?
[13:18] Bellwether: yep
[13:19] Siha: :D
[13:19] Siha: This demands a blog post.
[13:19] Leafshine: And, frankly, as I get older I need longer between boss fights.
[13:23] Leafshine: But, on the other hand, now I'm not so young and excitable, I'm less likely to suffer premature Blooms.
[13:23] Matticus: you people and your sexual innuendos

[13:18] Button: but don't worry Bell, even if you bloom early I doubt they'd be disappointed ;)
[13:18] Button: you've got the mp5 to try again

I Did What Last Night?

Because nobody can explain an adventure as well as Team Ratshag, I'll have to let Palintera tell about what we did last night that her mother can't know about. She's so cute.

As it is, I'm still stiff and sore, so I'm just gonna sit back, relax, listen to a story, and watch her squirm in embarrassment.

Though she may have left that part out.

I Missed It...

Okay, so granted the last post was important, but I can't believe I missed this.

That last post? It was my 69th post.

What did I do this morning when on a schoolwork break?

My lock got her succubus.

...

IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SO PERFECT.

I can't believe...augh. I...it just...so many wasted opportunities!

/cry

The Department of Awesome

[11:42] Jon: ok.. who decided it would be cool to equip phantom guests with goblin dragon guns?
[11:42] Nightravyn: o.O
[11:43] Bellwether: THE DEPARTMENT OF AWESOME
[11:43] Jon: no
[11:43] Jon: no
[11:43] Jon: the department of ninja buffs apaprently
[11:43] Bellwether: Like I said
[11:43] Bellwether: Awesome
[11:43] Bellwether: do not question the awesome
[11:44] Jon: hm
[11:44] Jon: i guess they had it last week too
[11:44] Bellwether: You're still questioning the awesome.
[11:48] Leafshine: Awesome violation. Awesome Agents dispatched. Stay where you are. Prepare for the Awesome.
[11:48] Bellwether: Damn straight, skippy.

Thrall is a Noob

When you can outrace someone's mount in travel form, they are a noob.

When someone is a shaman but only equips leather, and leather whites or grays at that, they are a noob.

When someone does not wait between pulls for the healer's mana, they are a noob.

When someone face-pulls every group, they are a noob.

Thrall.

You are a noob.

L2PLAY.

April Fool's!

Now, I know it's the day after, but I did pull a little trick on my guild yesterday. I just got the transcription on the event in screenshots from a fellow officer (in on the trick, as all of them were), but they're a little small. Therefore, under each picture I'll give a little recap of what happened!



Here's where it all begins. A confederate starts out saying some negative things about me in guild chat, and I get "all huffy" because I'm online. It's nice to see lots of people defend you, no? Which made it harder to be a b*tch in the end, but it also helps make the prank more believable. Grats to my confederate on his Nightmare Vine being sold.



Now, someone not in the know jumps into the fray trying to get us to act like adults. Normally, I wouldn't even bring this into guild chat, but in order for this to work I have to. So we basically ignore her and you see in my last line an inkling of what's about to happen next.



Most of the guild at this point is in stunned silence. Almost everyone in chat is a confederate of mine, except for the girl flipping her lid. She sent me a tell, too, but I asked her to wait "just a sec" and then I'd talk to her about it. Oh yeah. I ninja'd the guild bank too.



Here my confederates badmouth me behind my back. Awesome!



Onoes, our resident 10-year-old logged in. Hope she has her profanity filters on >.<



Plans to drown their sorrows are made while I ask to get reinvited back into the guild. Otherwise, my confederates have been having fun escalating things with each other.



And I'm back! Much rejoicing is had, and everyone goes "omg, nowai, i totally knew it!" And everything is hunky-dory again, and we all love each other, and I go back to doing my homework.

Happy April Fool's, everyone.

I AM FESTIVE

I am. But you're not going to know what I did until it's over. So, for anyone thinking I'm not as creative as everyone else, I tell you...

That may be true!

But you won't know until later.

Happy April Fool's!

The Return of Pirate Queen Bellwether

Oh no! It's one of those "what I did today" posts!

Well, if you want to know what the title's about, you have to read it! Mwahahaha. And you know, what I have to talk about is awesome.

My weekend did not have the most auspicious beginning. We were supposed to do Gruul's, but it didn't happen. So! We did the daily heroic. Which one was that, you ask? Slabs! Er, Shadow Labyrinth. /shudder

You see, I've run Slabs until Exalted, all for one thing. The idol. Which idol? Only the best frickin' idol in the game for a resto druid. That's right, that idol. And it has never, ever dropped. It has dropped three times for one of my feral friends, and for our boomkins, but never, ever for me. Everything else has dropped, probably even stuff not on the loot table. But I took a deep breath, grabbed the daily, and respec'd feral.

Wait, what? But you said you're staying resto!

Well, I am. But Twal's paladin needed the mace off of Murmur. And my Boomkin set is not up to par with my two feral sets. So I respec'd (forgetting Shredding Attacks /facepalm) and headed over to the instance. We brought along a ret paladin, a shadow priest, and a rather familiar paladin tank. Oops. No CC. Guess what that means? Yep, my tanking gear is in my bags. It may not be my strongest personal skill, but I'm there in a pinch.

So we head in, first pulls go well. The spriests is getting used to a new build, so he pulls some aggro, but we're mostly doing well. Then we get into the room with the banished first boss and pull a group of four and a Felguard. Oops. This is a heroic dungeon and this is potentially bad. I manage to activate my bear gear in my Outfitter seconds before getting into combat, and I grabbed the Felguard. No. One. Died. I'm gonna chalk that up to the amazingness of a pally tank, Twal's on-top-of-it heals, and lucky fear resists. That and some vain little self congratulations. /preen

Prior to my tanking gig (and there were more than a few spots I needed to tank due to lack of CC) I had almost 400 dps without Shredding Attacks or Omen of Clarity. Why without Omen? I'm a noob and forgot to add it to my action bar. Insert another /facepalm. I don't know personally, but Twal says that's not bad. I wasn't topping the other dps, but the spriest was rocking Frozen Shadoweave and the retpally was in dps epics.



Anyway, we get to the first boss and down him, and like always, I hold my breath while looting him.

No way. No. Really? No way. No. Way.

OMFG IDOL!



It seems all it took for me to get the blasted thing was to trick the instance. It did its usual scan and was like "Ah, Bellwether returns. I see we have finally beat her into submission and she has turned feral. We beat the resto out of her. Mwahaha. Put the idol back on the loot table."

Well, Slabs, I have one thing to say to you. (Following emote is NSFW)
t(^-^t)
(/endNSFW) I'm going back resto tonight for Kara. Up yours!

*ahem*

Anyway. We didn't get past Vorpal. He's a bitch. But along the way I got to do a lot more off-tanking. Usually not more than one mob because pally threat is insane. By the way, if you can, MC the shadow priests in the Inciter's room. They topped our dps charts with 1k+ damage. But we'd started late and people had to go after a few tries on Vorpal. Who is a bitch.

So, Easter Sunday! I'm stuck at college, so no family time. One of our priests wanted to go to through Strat, so Twal and I took our two ferals over and went through. Knocked the Baron out in under 45 minutes, but no mount dropped. Now, the priest had wanted to skip the Scarlet Monastary part. He left, and Twal and I headed over. We killed things etc, etc and then...I got the best drop ever.

Arr, maties, Pirate Queen Bellwether be back. And I see some scurvy dogs saw fit to retake the keep in me absense. Aye, they'll regret that, they will. Ready, aim, fire!



Wait, who is Pirate Queen Bellwether? What's the story on that? It's a story, an epic one, for another day. I know, I'm a tease. As it is now, I'm going to get used to being forced to dance during every raid due to what Twal got when we went back through to get me the Key to the City.

Deadmines Dress-up

Here's a fun game to play if you're ever bored!

Get a group of people together and head to the Deadmines (or Wailing Caverns, I suppose, but I prefer Deadmines personally). On the way, drop off all of your clothes in the bank. All of them. Don't hold onto your rings, or your weapons, or anything. Put them all in the bank, or your bags if you must. Then go to the instance.

Ready? Here's the game.

You go through the instance normally, just naked. As items drop, if you can equip an item, you do so. Blue, green, white or gray, it all goes on. Everyone rolls Need on BoE greens and BoP blues and phat epix, and the person who gets them, gets them. This means that clothies roll on leather and everything else.

Why is this?

The goal is to wear more clothes than anyone else by the end of the run. If you are, say, a priest who gets the leather pants off the goblin, congratulations! You have prevented a leather wearer from gaining a point. You get one point for every article of clothing (including jewelry and trinkets and weapons) that you are wearing at the end of the run.

Now, clothies and leather wearers may seem disadvantaged, but they do get a bonus.

Clothies: 2 point bonus
Leathers: 1 point bonus
Plate/Mail Wearers: 0 point bonus

This way, if a cloth wearer only gets leather drops or mail drops, they still have a possibility of winning.

So, keep everyone else from getting dressed while putting your own clothes on. It's like reverse strip poker, only you start out naked and you get to party with Mr. Smite.

It's great fun!

What do you win? Well, that's up to you. You could win a gold pot, or some rare drop, or perhaps a private session with that hot little dwarf with the cute boxers.

O_o

Wow, so you all apparantly really liked Feralicious. There are so many links to it on so many blogs and forums (some I can't even visit without registering, so I hope what they're saying about it isn't too bad) that it seems to be responsible for a large portion of my blog's visitors. Thanks everyone!

I'd like to take this time to point out that Bear may have found someone to sing it, so if you want to get away, now would be the time.

Also, Phaelia at Resto4Life has written her own song, entitled "My Trunk," another Fergie song , but this one for Restos.

And for those who don't know, the very first druid-type song I ever read was by Soboruto of Steamwheedle Cartel who modified "Under the Sea" into "Summon the Trees."

Once again, thanks to everyone who has visited. Expect more posts from me soon; I'm on spring break and so sleeping in.

...what have I done?

Important Note: Previously, I was missing a line to the rap. All is well and it is fixed. No one noticed, but that's probably because you wanted to save my fragile little ego. How sweet of you!

Seriously, this is all Bear's fault. He basically made me do this. All I did was mention how "Feralicious" sounds like "Fergalicious" and it spawned this huge thing where everyone wanted me to write it. So, I took a couple days and, against my better judgement, did so.

Once again, I'm really sorry. Bear's talking about finding a professional to remake it. Button's talking about making me sing it. I hope that's one torture the world never experiences.

Feralicious

One, two, three, pull

[Male Part]
Listen up y’all ‘cause this is it
The bear that is tankin is for the win

[Female]
Feralicious definition: lacerate and mangle
Don’t use caster, don’t spam moon blaster, lacks entangle
You can heal me, you can’t kill me
I ain’t wiping, this ain’t hyping
I’ve got key binds, you should see mine
I’ll just own your face in no time

Feralicious (feralicious)
But I ain’t coniferous
This bear is just ambitious
My stats are all factitious
I am vicious
Make all the guilds slash who, who
And they be waitin’ in my queue ‘cause I’m good at what I do

Feralicious (I rock, rock)
Feralicious (Recount’s got me top, top)
Feralicious (You cannot take this M-T’s spot)
I’m feralicious (t-t-t-t-t-tankin’, tankin’)

Feralicious def-
Feralicious def-
Feralicious def- (echo)
Feralicious definition, down them bosses easy
They always think I’m cheatin’
But that just makes ‘em crazy
I am U to the R, T, A the N, the K
And if you want no wipes you’ll do just what I say

I’m feralicious
DPS is vicious
Duel it up with me and the outcome’s not auspicious
Repetitious
Make all the guilds slash who, who
And they be waitin’ in my queue ‘cause I’m good at what I do (one two three pull)

Feralicious (I rock, rock)
Feralicious (Recount’s got me top, top)
Feralicious (You cannot take this M-T’s spot)
I’m feralicious (hold, hold, hold, hold, hold up, buff the raid)

Guildy, guildy, guild-y
If you really want me
Maybe get some patience
Maybe then you’ll get a tank
Run’ll be easy, easy
Epic drops there will be
It’s so easy, easy
My threat is crazy

[Male]
M to the A to the N G L E – bear you’re tankin’
M to the A to the N G L E – bear you’re tankin’
L to the A to the C E R A T E S, L to the A to the, to the, to the

[Female]
All the time I turn around guildies gather ‘round always wantin’ some instance boss down, wantin’ all my (threat)
I just wanna say it now – I ain’t tryin’ to round up drama, I don’t wanna, I’m not gonna take your spot
And I know I'm coming off just a little bit conceited
And I keep on repeating how the raid bosses eat it
But I’m tryin’ to tell, how much skill it takes to do this well
‘Cause they say I’m…

Feralicious (feralicious)
But I ain’t coniferous
This bear is just ambitious
My stats are all factitious
I am vicious
Make all the guilds slash who, who
And they be waitin’ in my queue ‘cause I’m good at what I do

One, two, three, pull

Feralicious (swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe)
Feralicious (swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe)
Feralicious (swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe)
I’m feralicious (t-t-t-t-t-tankin’ tankin’)

[Male]
M to the A to the N G L E – bear you’re tankin’
M to the A to the N G L E – bear you’re tankin’
M to the A to the N G L E – bear you’re tankin’
M to the A to the, to the (one, two, three, pull)
L to the A to the C E R A T E S, to the
L to the A to the C E R A T E S, to the
L to the A to the C E R A T E S, to the
L to the A to the, to the, to the (one, two, three, pull)

L to the A to the C E R A T E S, to the
L to the A to the C E R A T E S, to the
L to the A to the C E R A T E S, to the
L to the A to the, to the, to the, to the, to the (fade out)

Rep Grinds is Da Poop!

By all means, please scroll down to the previous post and continue the lovely debate on the Lifebloom nerf. But, now, for something completely different:

The Ratshag Rep Grind. Haven't heard of it? Well, we all know we want rep with that bugger, and who wouldn't? He details the rep grind over at that blog of his, and I decided, since I was suddenly holding a rare moment of disposable time...

To create the items mentioned.

Don't judge me!

So, let's begin! What is needed for Neutral (necessary for Alliance only /cry) is this:


Next, we move to Friendly status requirements:


At Honored, you need:


When you get to Honored, you can buy:


Revered requires:


Exalted is the hardest yet, as it always is:




But! You get:



And perhaps best of all, the illustrious Ratshag to tank your instances. /swoon

The items, when you visit them on WoWitemcreator all have "Ratshag" as the author. This is due to some mix up on my part about one of the fill-in slots. I thought it was for tags, and just decided to be consistent. Sorry Rats, didn't mean to steal your name! They're all searchable under the tags "ratshag rep grind," including a few of my screw-ups.

A Life in Pictures

I always go through my screenshots and see ones that I love but never really find an occasion to share. Well, since I seem to have this blog thing that some people glance at, and everyone liked the picture tiles before, I'm going to assault your senses again. This time, with pure unadulterated randomness.

Make sure you read the alt-text. If you're using Failfox (excuse me, "Firefox") you apparantly may not be able to see it. But if you go into the image's properties you can find it there.

Enjoy!






EDIT: Siha over at Banana Shoulders talked to me about how to add titles to this so Failfox isn't quite so fail anymore. In exchange I taught her about steam tonks!

Draw!

So, this is I suppose a "fluff" post since I have so much Uni work right now. Please, enjoy my artistic stylings.

How Bell should look (and hopefully there will be this hairstyle as an option in WotLK)
Mangle!

I wanna see your drawings too!

Happy Valentine's Day! (Some NSFW Content)

[Bellwether] "Hey baby, you look like my WoW character. Why don't we go back to my place and PvP?"
[Ves] omg!
[Ves] I so would.
[Ves] If somebody said that to me... really. Points for creative and lol.
* Bellwether nods.
[Ves] Well, I wouldn't sleep with them just for it. But talk at least.
[Malachiel] :D
[Malachiel] They would have me from 'WoW'. Ah, but I don't know how I would respond to 'Hey baby'.
[Bellwether] Of course.

…

[Bellwether] Blessing of Protection?
[Malachiel] It only lasts 8 seconds...I have to be quick.
[Ves] >.>
[Bellwether] Hmmm.
[Bellwether] No, that won't do.
[Malachiel] Hmm, I can use talents to increase it.
[Malachiel] !
[Malachiel] I can use Holy Shield.
[Ves] Or cleanse.
[Malachiel] Cleanse is more efficient.
[Ves] <-- smrt
[Ves] magic, disease or poison.
[Malachiel] !!
[Malachiel] It's the 'morning after' spell!
[Ves] batsu. AND poison
[Bellwether] Druids do it in seven forms, depending on spec. Pallies do it with Lay on Hands. Hunters do it with their pets. Shamans do it with earthshock.
[Ves] it is.
[Ves] earthshock? it's that good? drool
[Malachiel] Wow.
[Bellwether] :D
[Bellwether] Warlocks do it with a succubus.
[Meekrob] sucks to be hunters...
[Ves] H-A-W-T
[Bellwether] Mages do it with sheep.
[Ves] Meekrob, reroll shaman /nod
[Meekrob] rogues do it from behind?
[Bellwether] Warriors do it protection spec.
[Meekrob] rogues have to sap them to get some?
[Malachiel] By that same reasoning, hunters have traps...
[Ves] ew. surprise buttsechs ftl.
[Meekrob] rogues = date raep class
[Malachiel] No no. They can dps slooowly.
[Bellwether] (rogues do it from behind is too obvious, I was looking for something else. "always say I wuv you after surprise buttsecks")
[Malachiel] They are good for all night long.
[Malachiel] Also, for affairs.
[Bellwether] Resto druids do it with wood.
[Malachiel] Husband: OMG who you are in the bed with?!!?
[Malachiel] Cheating rogue: Lol *vanish*
[Malachiel] Cheating wife: "Nobody dear...are you seeing things..?"
[Ves] Priests too. Lol *fade*
[Bellwether] Priests do it with a shield.

…

[Ves] But hunters? *feign death* in bed? fail!
[Bellwether] Hunters do it with a snake trap. ;)
[Malachiel] O_O
[Ves] :D
[Malachiel] Flee!!!!
[Bellwether] Feral druids do it with frenzied regeneration.
[Ves] Dear Bell,
[Ves] Respec again.
[Ves] hearts, Ves

...

[Meekrob] hunters use rapid fire. /sob
[DaniAnnasBed] Hunters do it with aimed shot.
[DaniAnnasBed] :D
[Sky_Work] :D
[Sky_Work] Accuracy is very important! No surprise buttsechs!
[anna] So, that is not what I thought about aimed shot.
[anna] >.>
[Malachiel] O_O
[Ves] Anyway...
* Bellwether thought that too, Ves.
* Ves hi-5's dani
* Bellwether hi-5's!
[Ves] (moar palis)
[Bellwether] Mages do it with a staff
[Malachiel] :D
[Meekrob] hunters --> multishot
[Ves] Some palis do it with a 1h. Some do it with a 2h.
[Bellwether] Some palis have weapon expertise ;)

…

[Meekrob] hunters can tame the beast..
[Malachiel] Paladins can summon their own mount.

[Bellwether] Mages also do it Slow
[Bellwether] Tanks do it with stamina.

…

[Bellwether] Shamans do it with an Enhancing Totem.
[Malachiel] :D
[Ves] Problems in the bedroom? Which healer to choose? Druids do it with healing touch, palis do it with shocks.
[Bellwether] Druids also do it with rejuvenation.
[Ves] A pali will flash you.
[Bellwether] Hawt!

…

[Ves] Dwarves also have no problem to find treasure.

…

[Bellwether] Engineers do it with toys.

…

[Ves] Tauren do it with endurance.
[Malachiel] A paladin does it as a Sacred Duty.
[Ves] Avoid gnomes. The next morning they are totally Escape Artists.
[Malachiel] ( XD )
[Malachiel] Enchanters do it with rods.
[Bellwether] Priests also flash you.
[Malachiel] Draenai are horny.
[Bellwether] omg, Priests are pervs. They do it with mind vision.
[Bellwether] Also, mind control.
[Malachiel] ...
[Ves] A lock will just seduce you.
[Malachiel] Paladins do it with devotion.
[Bellwether] Warriors Overpower you
[Malachiel] Onyxia does it in disguise.
[Ves] Or for retribution (omg revenge!)
[Bellwether] Warriors also do it with recklessness.
[Malachiel] (omg!!)
[Malachiel] Warriors can do it with two at once.
[Bellwether] Warlocks do it with Tongues
[Ves] Good tanks can do more than one at once.

…

[Bellwether] A cat druid will ravage you.

…

[Bellwether] Druids do it with Lifebloom (omg pregnant!)
[Bellwether] Boomkins are a force of nature
[Ves] lucky, locks do it with drain life.
[Malachiel] A warlock has a seed of corruption.
[Bellwether] A warrior will disarm you.
[Bellwether] Eek. Warlocks do it with searing pain.
[Malachiel] Ouch.
[Ves] Some people like that.
[Malachiel] True.'
[Bellwether] Warlocks enslave you.
[Ves] It does cause a lot of aggro.
[Ves] But if you are bad, they'll banish you too.
[Bellwether] PvPers do it with each other.
[Malachiel] Raiders do it in groups of 25.
[Bellwether] Raiders used to do it in groups of 40.
[Ves] I prefer a 5-man.
[Malachiel] ( XD )
[Ves] I can only focus that many at one time.
[Bellwether] Some do it with a raid boss.
[Malachiel] Some do it with addons.
[Ves] Some do it with higher level characters for the experience.
[Meekrob] some are really, really into the role playing
[Malachiel] Hunters do it in leather.
[Meekrob] only at first /nod
[Meekrob] hunters can do it from far away
[Ves] (omg intimacy fail)
[Bellwether] Farmers do it for rep.
[Meekrob] and for money
[Ves] Farmers do it for the gold, grinders do it for the rep?
[Bellwether] Druids and rogues do it in leather, too. ;)
[Bellwether] Clothies do it in Robes of Insight.
[Ves] (Ves too)
[Bellwether] (hawt)
[Ves] Blizzard incourages ingame grinding. >.> really really

…

[Bellwether] Soloers do it in a PuG.
[Bellwether] HxC raiders do it several hours a night.
[Ves] PvPers do it cross-realms.

…

[Malachiel] Mac users do it with video capture.
[Ves] :D
[Malachiel] PC users do it with Windows open...
[Malachiel] Jewelcrafters do it to fill up sockets.
[Bellwether] Rogues do it with stealth.

…

[Ves] D: most fail class... feign death hunters or date raep rogues?
[Meekrob] rogues omg
[Bellwether] (of course, a hunter would say this)
[Ves] "I-I'm sorry. This doesn't usually happen. I must have clicked feign death..."
[Bellwether] LAWL
[Malachiel] (*Giggle*)
[Meekrob] h8...
[Ves] Here, let me lay on hands that for you.
[Malachiel] Alchemists have a potion that might help you with that.
[Bellwether] Regrowth?
[Ves] I can get a riding crop from a leather worker...
[Bellwether] Don't forget your spurs.
[Malachiel] Or your carrot.
[Malachiel] >.>
[Ves] Sure, I'd love to grind for my riding skill.

…

[Malachiel] Fishermen do it with their pole.

…

[Malachiel] Blacksmiths can hammer for hours.
[Bellwether] O.o ouch
[Bellwether] Mages do it with penetration.
[Bellwether] Arena teams do it with resilience.
[Bellwether] And at the end of the week they're rated on their performance.

…

[Bellwether] Thrall does it with Jaina. O.o
[Malachiel] ...
[Malachiel] Illidan does it to prepare you.
[Bellwether] Or!
[Bellwether] You are not prepared for how Illidan does it
[Malachiel] !!!
[Malachiel] Illidan does it for TEN THOUSAND YEARS.
[Bellwether] omfg.
[Bellwether] that's...WOW.
[Malachiel] omg foreplay pls?
[Bellwether] sore much.

It's not my fault this time.

Last night we raided Kara again. Knocked out Attumen, Moroes, Maiden, Opera, Curator, Shade and Chess all in one go (plus a few half-hearted attempts on Nightbane, Netherspite and Prince), and thusly I was tired this morning. And Kestrel had left a comment asking for more songs, this time about Hunters and Priests. And since, for some reason, you all like torturing yourself in this way, and I had classses I was too tired to pay attention in, I wrote some more!

Here's the one for Hunters. Doesn't flow as well as I would like, but it's good enough for being very sleepy. It's to the tune of "Wake Up Call" by Maroon 5.

Raid check call
Set the trap down now
Shoot your target in the head
Why can't you CC anymore?
The mob is free
What's the plan now?
Feign Death fall
Healers got the aggro
Now the whole raid group is dead
We don't bring that hunter anymore
Since we got a new one
Repair bills ain't so bad.

That one kind of sucked, so I'm gonna work on a better one. I also want to make it clear I do not think Kestrel is huntarded in the least. I just am not bitter at all about our one hunter misdirecting another hunter, and then failing to misdirect the tank on another pull resulting in my immediate and swift death. I repeat, not bitter at all.

Next song is to the tune of one of my personal favorite bands, Mae. The song is called "Brink of Disaster." It's for the priesties.

We're on the brink of disaster
The tank is getting hit way too hard
This fight should be better
Looks like this try is going to fail
Now the boss is hitting faster
What happened now, how did we get a shield?
The priest got off a big one
We're back in control, and back to Flash Heal!

And now, because I'm weird, I came up with another one. Sometimes nursery rhymes get stuck in my head. In this case, it was the "This Old Man" song. You know, "This old man, he played one, he played knick-knack on my drum..." song. If you don't know it, please revisit childhood. Anyway, it goes like this:

QQ moar, QQ moar
lawl and kek, Roll On The Floor
With an OP nerf bat
What The F*ck pwn
Gank some n00bs in the starting zone.

.
.
.
/sigh

I shouldn't get up so early...

Despite the fact that signing up for 8am classes is arguably the stupidest thing an avid WoW player can do, I did it. And I of course regret it. And now you will too. I'm about to subject you to the inner-workings of my sleep-starved mind and you may never come back to this blog. Or you might enjoy it. Who knows?

Our tale begins with my morning ritual of checking webcomics. One such webcomic today was the newest Questionable Content, featuring a few of the characters at a karaoke bar. One of them starts singing a song. That song was "Fat Bottomed Girls" by Queen. I latched onto the lyrics and let them cycle through my head. And, as my mind is wont to do, it started to twist them and look for different ways to sing the song.

So, Bear, this is for you:

Ohhhh you gonna tank the raid tonight
Ohhhh down that frickin' Netherspite
Ohhhh you gonna give it all you got
Fat-bottomed bears
You make the ZA boss go down

It's...a little pathetic. And just to make things clear, BBB is a very svelte bear.

But wait, there's more.

Since I did that, my next thought was "what other songs can I twist horribly?" Apple Bottom Jeans. Yep. Sorry, Phae.

She got that Mooncloth robe set
Her form ain't got fur (ain't got fur)
The whole raid's relyin' on her
Its certain doom
'Til she hits the room
Phaelia cast bloom, bloom, bloom,
bloom, bloom, bloom,
bloom, bloom

Where you going? I'm not done yet. I thought, "why should druids get all the fun?" (besides the obvious), so I thought of something for rogues. Welcome to FutureSex/LoveSound (if you value your sanity, click this then hide the window), rogue style.

Rogue snuck up on me
Ambush stun-lock *groan*
Another kidney shot
My trinkets not ready to blow
I must be a future (future) honor (honor) kill point
And when I go down
All I can think about is

Stun-lock is so OP
Stun me like this
Stune me like that
(ow-ow, ow-ow)

...
Yeah, I know. "Go to bed, Bell." Shush.

Following the Herd

It's time to try this again. There was a community post idea over at BA about what you love about your class. I decided to do it in pictures. Let's conintinue, shall we? Click on the pictures for the larger versions. Silly sayings belong to Alamo, not me.

Seal Form Go!

Well, it was my challenge, so I should give it a go, right?

What do you mean, what challenge?! Well, here it is:

Challenge:
Hypothetical situation: Blizzard has introduced a new underwater zone to WoW. Due to this, they start giving all classes underwater abilities. The druid seal form is now utilized for more than simple travel.
Your goal: Design abilities for the seal form! Is the seal a healer? Magical dps? Physical dps? Tank? Utility? CC? Something entirely new?

I'm going from the tank point of view, grabbing a bunch of different ideas from tanks all over. But not just any tank; a tank with CC.

I'd revamp the seal's abilities, for instance, and, in keeping with the other forms, give it a nice new aura.

Shapeshift into aquatic form, increasing swim speed by 50% and allowing the druid to breathe underwater, increasing melee attack power by 120, armor contribution from items by 400%, and Stamina by 25%. Also protects the caster from Polymorph effects. Grants members of your party within 40 yards the ability to breathe under water. Allows access to several seal abilities.

What? You just copy pasta'd the bear's abilities into there and added some fancy aura for breathing as if you have gills! Absolutely. Bears are tanks because of this, therefore, a seal tank needs it.

Now, on with the skills.

We're giving seals Mangle, 'cause they need it. In place of lacerate, though, they have:

Harpoon - Hit enemy for a high amount of threat. Causes 200 bleed damage over 20 seconds.
It's a lacerate without the initial damage and a longer duration. Not a big change, but necessary.

For the Pod - Charge an enemy attacking a comrade, stunning the enemy for five seconds.
That's right, it's a charge that only works if an enemy goes loose. Why? The warriors would QQ if we got everything good.

Next we have Bite, your run-of-the-mill damage attack. La-dee-da.

Fin Slap - Interrupt an enemy's spell cast and prevent spells of the same school from being cast for three seconds.
Standard interrupt.

Puncture Lung - The target begins drowning for three seconds and is unable to move or use any abilities. Fifteen minute cooldown.
Drowning does a lot of damage. Even three seconds of this is hurtful. And since they're unable to move or cast, it's gonna hurt. Thus the extensive cooldown.

But you said there was CC!
I'm getting to it.
Ah...here we go.

Bubble Breath - Encase enemy target in a bubble, preventing them from moving or using any abilities. Breaks on damage.
Yep! It's the druid's very own CC, underwater though it may be. I can already hear the shaman crying.

What about a tank's "oshi-" button? Well, here it is.

Natural Selection - Player gains 10% temporary health and 50 haste rating for fifteen seconds. All physical debuffs are inactive for these fifteen seconds. At the end of the fifteen seconds, the debuffs will resume as normal.
Wow! That's crazy! Yep, it'll make druids the must-have-tank for all these water encounters. And it will be sweet, sweet victory.

It's all gonna be nerfed in a couple patches anyway.

Others who answered the challenge:
Swiftpaw
Tabdruid