Thursday, July 17, 2008

Bellbell Writes a Letter

Dear Bigredkitty,

I don’t normally do this, but Bellwether tells me that my normal method of axe-to-the-face isn’t going to work with you. Besides you being much more experienced than me with better gear and more levels and some sort of enlarged crimson feline, you can most likely destroy my face for the exact reason I’m writing you. I’m also supposed to be “polite” because Bell is friends with some of your friends and blah blah blah I stopped listening to her at some point.

Anyway, so I was in STV and I met this Blood Elf hunter. “Met” as in, I was killing a gorilla and she sent her stupid pet after me. I don’t even remember what kind of pet, because I didn’t care about it. I just cared about tracking that hunter down and smashing her face in. And even though she ran from me, I have Pursuit of Justice and two stuns, so catching up was as easy as sharpening my axe. But I ran into a problem.

She froze me. I was a giant icicle! And then she fled. She fled to the goblins and I could only take my frustrations out on the next druid, rogue, warrior and priest I met. The same who later joined forces to destroy me, because apparantly they can't take me on their own.

Not only that, but she did it again later, running to the goblins again!

Now, you may think, “What’s this got to do with me?” But I’m sure you know exactly what it has to do with you, sir. You know, I generally think of you as a fine, upstanding member of the Alliance, with that thing that you do. I’m sure it’s surgery or professory or something, because I don’t know how else all these hunters are losing the rocks in their heads, and it’s all very admirable, ra, ra. Pom poms. Woo.

But I find such things as this and this to be questionable in nature. Gloating about killing a paladin? Teaching people how to kite melee dps cough paladins cough? My, my. The only redeeming nature of the one article is that it’s a Blood Elf that you killed, and everyone knows they need to be put out of their misery. The druggies will just go through withdrawal at some point anyway. Better to save them the misery, yeah? Plus, it’s great fun to watch them squeal about their nails and their hair and oh my GAW that was PRADA.

Anyway. So. Yeah. I guess what I’m saying is either make your blog Horde-proof or stop blogging about kiting paladins. It’s bloody annoying to be kited by a hunter, especially when I would just need to catch up and you'd be sucking dirt through a straw.

Bellwether is telling me not to add threats to this. She says I can’t carry them out and its undiplomatic and won't accomplish anything. Since I can't kick her butt yet and she is the captain, I have to say PLEASE.

She also says its ridiculous to even ask, but then again she made a fuss about the bloodstains on the letter. I told her it wasn’t my blood, but for some reason that didn’t reassure her.

Anyway. So yeah, that’s it.


P.S. Bellwether told me not to post the letter with the blood on it. She gave some sort of excuse like “It’s hard to read” but I thought it drove the point home better. Feh.


BRK said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
BRK said...

So what you're saying is... you want a BRK Advanced Kiting Symposium, is that what you're saying.

/takes notes

OK, we're on it!



Armond said...


1. a meeting or conference for the discussion of some subject, esp. a meeting at which several speakers talk on or discuss a topic before an audience.
2. a collection of opinions expressed or articles contributed by several persons on a given subject or topic.
3. an account of a discussion meeting or of the conversation at it.

Because I had to look it up.

Bell said...

@BRK - you'll have to excuse my paladin. She gets frustrated easily. Though, I'm really intrigued by this symposium :D

@armond - l2vocabulary!