Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Admit and Apologize

It hurts to look at something you've put a lot of work into, and realize you've done a bad job with at least one part of it. It hurts even more to realize you've been trying to ignore it, though it's been staring at you this whole time. Though people are reading it and you're confusing them, messing them up. And instead of fixing it you start avoiding it.

I've done a lot of things with this blog that I'm proud of. A lot. That being said, I've also done a lot of things I'm not. I've written things with completely faulty information. I've written things that were just plain wrong. I've gotten mad at stupid things, and looking back on a lot of what I've written I'm glad to see that I've come a long way. I don't always do well, or hit the mark, but I've done at least a decent job.

The regemming for haste post has bothered me since I hit "Publish Post." I knew I wasn't thinking about it enough, that I didn't have any real support for it, that it was just plain bad...and I published it anyway, so I could have something written and done between the time of finals and when I'd have some more time.

You've all noticed how poorly thought out, supported and reasoned it is. And I refuse to remove it, because people have made great points in comments. I've tacked on a disclaimer so people know not to trust what they're reading on it. But I feel it needs a little bit of follow-up past just rewriting. Especially as, well, the rewriting is going to take a while.

I am working on a rewrite to it. Unfortunately, part of the reason that post was so terrible is that I am not in a good place right now, both in and out of WoW. A huge deluge of real life problems and personal issues are pulling me away from WoW, which before was my haven from these things. I don't have a raiding guild anymore, and I don't feel it's responsible for me to apply somewhere when I can't commit at this point in time, and when you can't do what you enjoy in a game, it really sucks. But I still want to keep playing and keep writing, because it's still a nice break from things when I just can't deal with another problem blowing up in my face.

If there are other posts that come before the Gemming Haste rewrite, understand I'm not putting it off, it's just going to take a lot of work to try and do it right, and other things may get written in the meantime. I have posts owed other people, and I want to make sure they get done.

I don't know if this seems over-dramatic for a single post, but this blog and the information is contains is pretty important to me. I enjoy writing in it, I enjoy helping people, and when I print something so poorly done, it bothers me (and it bothered many of you). Please know I'm working to correct it, and if you want to keep commenting on the old one, please do. It can only help, and as soon as I can I'll address and fix everything.

Though it's likely not needed to be said, I request that those of you who know the specifics of some of the personal/real life issues mentioned briefly please not post any details of them in the comments.


lissanna said...

Honestly? most bloggers don't spend 10 hours working out math before suggesting something in a blog post. That's just not really reasonable. Sometimes, I just go with my best judgment and re-edit things as people disagree.

We're humans & not paid to blog. People are free to disagree, and even the theorycrafting math is flexible. Rawr's calculator will gem what you tell it to, and the gear priorities change based on the gear you currently have, and the information you plug into the calculator.

It's almost impossible to make a guide that is going to apply to every single person who is reading a blog.

Keredria said...

This post and the sentiment and reasons behind it are why you are such an awesome blogger Bell... for me more so than whether the gemming haste post is right or not.

Not sure if that makes total sense or not (I've been kinda non-sensical lately...)

Anyways, here to your real life drama winding down and things working themselves out soon.

/tree hugs

Sapling said...

I have been following your blog for quite some time now, but have never left a commment despite learning tons from your posts. I think blogs exists to offer different viewpoints. As to whether these viewpoints are "right" or "wrong", it is all relative.

Still, kudos for being able to admit that you might be wrong. Not everyone has the guts to do that. Thank you for your honesty and hope everything works out for you soon.

Forreststump said...

Spreadsheets do not account for baddie [insert DPS class here] pulling aggro, or people standing in fire, or firing off a heal to assist a tank healer when the tank is precariously close to death. They do not account for the [insert buff provider here] dying unexpectedly and your [insert buff here] dissipating.

They model nice, smooth [PICK ONE: single target healing/DPS/raid healing] in a sterile environment where there is nothing to break the carefully computed cycle. In theory, that's great. In practice, it NEVER HAPPENS THAT WAY.

Kayeri said...

Bell, real life always comes first, we all know that. And you stated your view, and there is nothing at all wrong with that. In your view, spellpower trumps haste. Math or no math, this is YOUR opinion and you put it out there as you have every right to do.

Spellpower vs haste is something each of us will have to balance against our needs and playstyle. There is never a one-size-fits all formula that matches everyone's needs. There are just too many variations on playstyles, raid compositions, and fights for that to effectively happen.

You know I've not been happy with my haste and although it is improving, I would like to bump it some more. But I am not regemming to do it myself. I need my spellpower and my regeneration to keep going the way I do now.

ICC has proven a challenge for my little guild, especially over the holidays when our heaviest-hitters are off with family for awhile.

So you take care of YOU, because you know we'll be here when life sorts itself out. ;)

Anonymous said...

Just came across your blog for the first time. I'm adding it to my bookmarks, because it is seldom that I come across blogs that are written "from you to me" (e.g. another good, personable blog would be Big Bear Butt).

I think you need to just sit back and take your time.

Angelya said...

Hope you're okay bell /hugs

Take as long as you need :)

Joar said...

Bell - I'd take your hunches over gigabytes of spreadsheets and analysis any day. Don't feel bad about posting what feels right to you! Hope the RL stuff sorts itself out for you!

Naithin said...


I'm so sorry to hear that things are going poorly for you in both RL and IG at present. It's bad enough when it's just one or the other.

Don't fret too much over the blog at the moment, post what you can when you can, but don't let it become yet another stressor right when you need it least.

Anonymous said...

Hang in there Bell! I hope that everything is OK.

Nobody is perfect, and certainly nobody expects you to be either!

Take care of yourself, and remember chocolate helps all problems!


Poncho x said...

Bellbell, I stumbled across your blog at work, bored as hell and ive been devoutly reading it everyday ever since.

I play a holy paladin and holy priest on Aman Thul (girls are born to heal right?) and since reading your blog I rerolled a resto druid whos 40 atm.

As previous posters have said you are not paid to blog...for me 99% of the time I find your articles amusing, insightful, entertaining and thought provoking - if one of them is slightly off, who cares we still like to read it :)

I hope your personal life sorts itself out soon, because the game needs more bell's and less spell hit weapon weilding dk's.

I just wanted to let you know how much I enjoy your blog and I hope I dont sound like a stalker right now :<!

Keeva said...

I think you're being too hard on yourself. The post was fine. I didn't agree with it, myself, but I didn't think it was a bad post. As others have said, it's not always about the hard math. A lot of us are here to write about our take, our styles and strategies.

The math may be "right", but if we all just follow the rules, zzz. Even Blizzard want us to stop being so mathy - which is why they're getting rid of some stats in Cataclysm - because they feel we've become too obsessed with the numbers and not with our own personal play styles and ideas.

Yeah, it's nice to have someone barf out the maths for us and dictate which are the best min/max talents - but it's ALWAYS good to hear the subjective fors and againsts, the personal experiences, and the deviations that make the game interesting for each of us individually.

Don't stress so much! :)

Hope things look up for you soon <3

Kring said...

Can we have another Moonkin comic in the meantime? :-)

lethal said...

Merry Christmas

Dechion said...

Hope things work out wel for ya Bell, in game and out.

*beams supportive thoughts in Bell's direction*

Maaya said...

Good attitude. I read the haste gemming article and thought it was too opinionated without good supporting evidence, but I also recognize two things:

1) Theory and practice often differ. Especially when it involves other people, such as a raid or party. Just as one example, look at the warlock simucraft and how fight mechanics change the actual results.

2) Good players often have good hunches. This is not something one can explain, but is just as valuable as theory and logic in actual play.

Beyond that, it's a blog. Now if it was a science journal, all the bashing would be very much justified. But this is a blog that is personal in nature. Don't be too hard on yourself. You need to maintain your individuality, too. It's not like you're posting on

Olga said...

I wish you best of luck with your issues, and i hope all will be fixed soon. The good thing about WoW is that you can get back to the game in any time after a break, and find everything on their places.
As for the post - it's interesting to read about your experience and your opinions, even if they somehow contradict with math.

Larísa said...

Good lord. If I put that kind of pressure on myself there wouldn't be any Pink Pigtail Inn.
To ramble a bit and to be inconsistent is the privilege of a non-payed blogger. Don't forget that. I don't often give advice to other bloggers, but now you trigger the nurturing Mom in me. So listen: take care about yourself. Spell haste isn't important. You are.
We like you exactly the way you are.
I hope all those things that bother you now - RL and gamewise - will sort out. They always do. Not always the way we expect, but there will be better times.

Comfort, thoughts and hugs from your innkeeper.

theGnomeDruid said...

If this post proves anything, it's that you're human. And therefore:
a) entitled to your own opinion on things
b) entitled to make mistakes from time to time.

I look forward to the final conclusion of what works for you once you have time to put the thought into it.

Until then: Merry Christmas. May your New Year be a little less stressful.

Anonymous said...

Sweetie I wish you a wonderful holiday season. I hope the new year will bring you peace and joy. Thank you for all the hard work you put into this blog.

lxsli said...


Kathryn said...

I would really appreciate a post on which idol is actually better, the Idol of the Black Widow or the idol of flaring growth. Any thoughts?

Nightwhisp said...

When I found you I was an awful healer. I couldn't get through ToC 5 regular. Now I have sucessfully healed every 5 man heroic several times and am moving on to raids. In my eyes you are remarkable beyond measure; so don't worry about a little bit of math, none of your advice has ever failed me. My wish and hope for you is a much better New Year both ingame and in RL.